Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Ask me what to blog

I know, i know, I haven't been blogging....

problem is, I have no idea what to blog.

Why don't you tell me what to blog?
Ask me questions.

Friday, March 24, 2006

myHeritage.com

There is a new application online, which is quite fun to play with.
myHeritage.com

Basically you upload a photo, and it scans the face and match it with celebrities in their database, and see who do you look like.

So I upload my photo and half-expect Andy Lau to come up.




I look like Tiger Woods!! :D
Time to play golf....



These are the other celebrities I look like.
61% Zhang Ziyi!! LOL
I didn't know i so chio....

(#%!#$#@! I just realised that beside Tiger Woods, all the celebrities that I look like.....are FEMALES! wah lao. must be my delicate features and gentleness of my eyes.

Aiyah. chio means chio lah. (chio is hokkien for "pretty")

what to do.)




and then I decided to upload another photo of mine...
and guess what?
I look like 71% Zhang Ziyi!

I tell you liao, I am CHIO LAH!

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Career setback



Awards for cherub, 2005.
Old man gain horse, may not be a fortune.

塞翁失马,焉知非福...
塞翁得马,焉知非祸...

Monday, March 20, 2006

a Tammy advert


please click on it to see a bigger picture.


I am unable to verify the authenticity of this advert, but if its true, its pretty street-smart of MSN to use a local hot topic (which internet surfer don't know Tammy by now?) to attract attention to its blog.


definitely one of the attention-grabbing banner around!

Chinese Poem



Once u have feasted enough on the lady, do look at the poem.
if anyone understands it, please leave a comment? :)

Thursday, March 16, 2006

the secret army outpost

[Editor: These photos are of my reservist stint 2 weeks ago.... I am no longer serving in the army....]

it was the worst of times.
and it was the best of times (for my team, at least).

we were at the border of civilisation, looking for a decent place to, ah how do you civilians phrase it, "set up camp"?

so we walked, and we spot something interesting.
Look at the photograph below, click it to see an enlarged picture. Spot any interesting stuff?



Do not scroll down until you've given up....

.
.
.
.

So we reached the unusual spot.
As some idiotic star-wars fan would have said, there was a disturbance in the grass.



And so we turned into the grassland and whoooo....we saw a clear opening.

alright, here's the bad news.
i forgot to take photos before we occupied the space.
in our excitment at finding an outstanding location for our military outpost, i forgotten how bloody disrupting our activities can be.

it was a clearing in the grassland, done by foreign workers. large pact of lands, with different "sections". most importantly, there were make-shift tables, flat pieces of wooden sheets, and lots of plastic chairs.

do u hv any idea how wonderful plastic chairs are?

i don't know how to explain to people who have never manned an outpost for days, but plastic chairs...whooo...they are like.....its almost better than sex.

anyway, the rest of the photos show the place after occupied by us.

so let us turn in....



so once u turn into the "grassland", u would notice that the entrance is marked like an arched door.....
can't believe whoever made this place actually took the trouble to made the arched doorway.




And you would see the main "living room". where we found the plastic chairs, the makeshift tables, and mattress. We didn't dare to touch the mattress though. god knows what had touched it....
and there were canvas sheets and wooden sheets....for our roof and our floor.
excellent!

(note the censored part is our military equipment, i don't wanna run the risk of disclosing any classified materials)




and then as u venture deeper, you would find "BEDROOMS".
yup. sections of the place, segregrated, and with canvas sheets for privacy.


why would anyone need bedrooms and privacy in a jungle settlemend, u ask.....



let me add something to the equations => wrappers....all over the floor.
wrappers of....




condoms!! NB!!!

we ventured into an illegal jungle den of vice!!
a den of prostitution!!

wah lao damn gross can.
quite sickening that we had to spend a few days in the midst of disposed condoms and tons of sperms.....
anyway, i reassured myself that no dieases can survive in the open environment for more than few seconds.
still quite gross......(though i wonder where are the prostitutes, hahaa)


and as if that is not gross enough.



i found the "toilet".
yes yes, tons of used toilet papers in a big hole.

gross.

anyway, we didn't leave the place. the advantages outweight the disadvantages by a lot.
the plastic chairs offered great pleasure, the land was cleared, there were a lot of spaces for our military baggages. and there was enough jungle to camoflague our place.

best of all, we can play BIG-2 on chairs.


we turned it from a den of prostitutions to a den of gambling!
HAHAHA
(note: we didn't gamble lah, we just play cards to spend away the time)


Anyway, the outpost was quite scary in the night.
now and then, groups of foreign workers would try and come in, and we would shout at them, asking them to go away.
typical singaporeans would have been shocked at being shouted, and would have cautiously gone away.

not foreign workers. they don't play by local rules.

they were not intimidated by us, not even when we were clearly baring weapons and on guard, shinning torchlights at them.

one guy even walked all the way into the outpost, ignoring our calls, and blatantly called out,
"tonight don't have ah?"

"don't have lah, GO AWAY."

in doubts, he would scan the area, as if trying to look for the hidden prostitutes.

Wah liew, 1 night without sex will die ah?

(note: no prostitutes turned up for work that night, we were rather disappointed)

Sunday, March 12, 2006

some sports r more evil than others

spot at a profile of a 15yo girl who msg-ed me on wholivesnearyou.com

i dun look like 15 but indeed i am...
i am not a childish gal.... my mentality is around 20yrs old.... tRue......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( Hehexxzz )
i Am an oLd aUntIe LiaO....

thIs 0uGhT to bE thE oXym0r0n 0F thE yE@r. i'm sUrE tHe perS0n wH0 wr0te thE ab0vE haS thE meNtaLiTy of 2O yrs old.

Hehexxzz.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the reservist training I just attended was a HighKey 2 weeks training, which was in preparation for a super-impt (aka super-sian) major exercise next year. mighty-sian. Then they told us, get prepared for another lowkey training in the last quarter just before the major exerise.
super mighty sian.

barely 1 week after this reservist, i got a new reminder that I am on alert amber for a certain period in April and May.

wah lao eh!!!
Defence's budget for 2006 just increased is it?
give me a break!


First day of our outfield, it rained heavily in the evening. 1st day only and we have to eat our packed dinner under the tonner (lorry) liao, with flashlight and an ugly face.
so sian.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

my friend beckon me to take on tennis.

"tennis?", i said, "are you insane?"

i was forced to learn tennis when I was in JC. it sucks. it is pure evil. to stand there and your opponent pepper you with shots.
i thought that the game should be about avoiding the balls.
you doubt me? HAVE YOU EVER BEEN HIT BY A TENNIS BALL?


noooooo..., the PE teachers insisted. they spent lessons after lessons educating us how to use the racket, how to run to the balls, blah blah.
the tennis lessons were stretched over a period of time, however by the 1st week, i have been trying my utmost to skip it.
i would join in, play for 10minutes, and mysterious disappear.

hell, i would even do maths if they ask me. (maths is puuuure evil too, but less tormenting.)

it came to a point that the PE HOD KNEW me.

nabei. actually he kept on finding "us" coz I was hanging out with this loud guy, but eventually he got to know who I was also.
and then he started teaching us tennis instead of the original teacher.

pure evil.
i kept on kanna caught by him for escaping tennis.

pure evil, i tell u!!!!!!


anyway, my friend was asking me to join him for tennis, this being the guy I asked him to join me for gym, for martial arts lesson (after watching Jet Li's Fearless), for golf....

no tennis, because of 1 simple reason.
have you heard of "soccer ankle"?
or "baskball hand"?
or "golf elbow"?

No right!! THEN WHAT IS TENNIS ELBOW U TELL ME
TENNIS ELBOW.

i tell u, tennis. pure. evil.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

heck i even refuse to play Virtua Tennis when it caught on in my hostel.
Virtua Tennis and you'll get a virtua tennis elbow, i told them.


but i would play tennis with her.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

Ready for battle

The SBO, skeleton battle order.
where we keep all our battle essentials.

2 water bottles of course, 1 pouch behind for impt stuff like poncho (& hammock, haha)

and of course, lots of small pouches in the front for important stuff like magazines (magazines that hold bullets, NOT 8Days or FHM), smoke grenades, frag grenades.



but of course.....i decided that i would be better off holding other impt stuff.



an army marches on its stomach!

Friday, March 10, 2006

Best Soldier Award

and the award goes to........









neofik, my army buddy for Mission Reservist!!

Wednesday, March 8, 2006

Secretary of Reservist

2 weeks of reservist really wreck havoc in your work life. man.

after 2 weeks of ahem, very-tough-but-absolutely-necessary-for-my-beloved-motherland training, I went back to work on a very tight schedule.
lots of backlog of clients to finish up, a lot more new clients to find, and lots of AHEM, UNNECESSARY meetings.

sigh. if my boss or colleague read this, i'm so dead.

i haven't been blogging so much coz I'm too tired from work nowadays, but yeah! i've finally managed to upload most of my pictures successfully.
in the next 24 hrs, i promise a very interesting army blog. with declassified photos....

you learn abt bangladesh workers foreign workers (i am not sure if they are indians or bangladesh), sex in the jungle, and how much food we eat.....

i know u only see "SEX IN THE JUNGLE".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and while I was in reservist, my sweet secretary quit.
sigh. she has been a wonderful secretary.
too bad she is in search of greener pastures....and heya Miss Sweetie (thats her name actually), all the best in your career, be it singing or wedding planning, MAYBE BOTH!!

the new Wedding Singer!!
LOL.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

so I met the new secretary today, and she was rather chirpy.
very nice girl, ahem, on the very first day she knew me, she promptly volunteered to matchmake me with her friends.

WAhahhahahaha. I LIKE HER ALREADY.

so she asked me wat kind of girls i like.


this kind lor.



i'll give anyone a tiffany if i get matchmade with such a girl. =)

Tuesday, March 7, 2006

The Art of Dating

eh, i just realised a lot of peers of my generation are marrying young. its so against what i read in the papers! what happened to all the reports of late marriage and childless couple?

why is everyone marrying? then me how.....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i was about to release a flood of army post....

but guess what I found in the mail?


nb. need to remind me I dunno how to date is it!
stupid SDU! u just wait! u wait!!

[any girl wanna volunteer my "art of dating"?]
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